This post is part of a series about our DIY Kentucky Vineyard wedding. It was such a labor of love and there is so much to tell, so I’ll be splitting it up into categories. I hope you’ll find some inspiration and entertainment from what we did for our wedding, along with some ideas for your own day! You can read about the music here, the venue here, the decorations here, the dress here or my favorite moments here!
Wedding season is upon us, so there are probably brides everywhere finishing up last minute details for their summer ceremonies.
If you’re going the more traditional route, you’ve undoubtedly already ordered all of your wedding party’s attire. However, the thought of everyone wearing the same thing didn’t really go with the style of our wedding (or my style at all), so I went another route. Every member of the wedding party chose their own dress or suit, based on a color palette Kyle and I put together.
If the thought of letting go of the control and allowing your wedding party to choose what they wear leaves you hyperventilating and breaking out in hives, let me try to convince you.
Everyone’s body, style and budget is different.
The members of our wedding party ranged from 5 foot 3 inches to over 6 feet tall. One of my bridesmaids gave birth less than a month before the wedding. Everyone’s styles ranged from traditional to adventurous. We also had our ring-bearers and flower girl, plus a set of younger girls from our families who helped out with the guestbook, programs and the drinks we handed out before the ceremony. We wanted them to be able to look cute and age-appropriate, but not make their parents feel like they had to buy something crazy expensive. We wanted to give everyone the freedom to choose something they would feel good in during the wedding day, and also something that would fit into their budget.
Having a tight budget ourselves, we didn’t feel like it was fair to ask our friends to spend a bunch of money on an outfit for our wedding if they couldn’t afford it. Having the freedom to choose their own dress or suit gave them the opportunity to either save some money or splurge on something they really wanted. We had people in the wedding party spend from $40 to $200.
A little variety makes for better photos.
Because the dresses and suits were just a little different from each other, the photos looked so much more interesting. Each ensemble fit the person who was wearing it, and that made the photos more about the people and less about the “stuff.” Everyone looked like themselves.
Trust your people.
Give your wedding party a little credit. They can choose something that will fit in with the wedding if you just give them a few guidelines. Our guidelines were to choose short, peach/blush colored dresses, or light grey suits. They wore whatever shoes they wanted. We bought the jewelry and ties. And on the wedding day, everyone’s outfits looked perfect together, as if we HAD chosen every single thing from a magazine spread. Also, just ask them to show you what they are thinking of buying before they purchase it, and that will give you a chance to say “Go for it!” and check them off the list, or perhaps steer them in a different direction.
Let it go.
This is the perfect opportunity to relieve yourself of some stress. Weddings are basically just a series of random decisions you have to make, decisions you never even THOUGHT were important. Why give yourself another thing you have to control and decide? There are bigger things to worry about. Just let it go.
There is a fine line between making things easier or more difficult for your wedding party by allowing them to choose whatever they want to wear, but I think as long as you are clear and helpful along the way, it can be a much more pleasant experience for everyone. My friend told me “You are the most laid back bride ever!” which made me so happy! Don’t get me wrong, I definitely had some stressed out moments, but I didn’t want to be a Bridezilla. I just wanted to get married and throw an awesome wedding where everyone had a blast. I like to think we were pretty successful, and everyone looked great, too.
What is your favorite look for wedding parties? Are you choosing for them or letting them choose for your wedding?
All photos by Jessica Hutchinson.